Jesus is Coming Saturday—Did You Get the Evite?

Better not make any weekend plans.

So warns one Harold Egbert Camping, 89-year-old founder of Family Radio, a Christian broadcasting network heard in 61 languages around the globe.

Camping—whose network is reported to be worth $100 million—has been preaching that Jesus will make his Second Coming to Earth on May 21 for at least two years now, and he’s attracted quite a following. People have even left their jobs and their families because they truly believe Camping’s message that the end times are nigh. Even Stephen Colbert agrees!

Though many Christians believe Jesus will indeed return someday, the consensus is that, quoting scripture, no one knows the hour or the time. It’s all a prelude to Oct. 21, 2011, when Camping says God will destroy the Earth.

That's right—no World Series this year! Then again, it's not like the Angels will make it that far anyway. Camping's version of the Messiah is clearly a hoops fan.

Many dissenters—pretty much every other mainstream Christian in America, as well as followers of other world religions—aren’t so sure about Camping's prediction. Jerry Tankersley, Senior Pastor of , tells Laguna Beach Patch that he's fearless enough to plan for regular Sunday services on May 22.

“In our faith, we believe Jesus is coming again, but he taught us to not predict the date,” Tankersley says. “I think that’s a great mistake, what (Camping) is doing. But if you look at the past 2,000 years of history, there have always been those who have made these predictions.”

Even Camping himself has done this end-times game before, in 1994, but he blamed his failed prognostication on a “miscalculation.”

“He’s a false prophet,” Tankersley continues. “We’re planning on being here Sunday, and our church building has been renovated to last for another 100 years.”

So what to do if Jesus actually does make a cameo Saturday?

How about a sing-along?

Meanwhile, here are some things that actually could bring about the end of the world.